This is one of the foundations of FitMama: Seeing it in your mind first. Dreaming big. Expecting that if anyone can do it, it can be you. This begins with the idea of an open mind.
Imagine what could be if anything were possible, because it truly is possible for you, obviously within reason of physics and the laws of the world.
This idea of maximizing your expectations really begins with opening your mind to possibility. I always talk about this concept of having a growth mindset. There is research out there by the famous Carol Dweck who talks about a fixed mindset vs a growth mindset. The differences are stark in the way that these two mindsets perform in the world. The ones that are fixed are very fixed and they don’t see things changing a lot from where they are at, and they don’t really move forward much in terms of their goals and dreams. Whereas the ones with the growth mindset are open to growth and possibility. They are open to imagination, knowing that things are not always what they seem to be. And often their dreams exceed even their expectations.
The research is brilliant and it’s all around this idea of a growth mindset in all areas of our lives. Are you open to having a growth mindset in relation to these things? When it comes to swimming or playing basketball with your kids, are you saying “Oh, I always sucked at basketball.” or are you saying “This is play time with my kid, I’ve got this.” Maximizing your expectations of yourself, knowing that if you read it through or just try it, you will figure it out. Expecting the maximum from yourself.
Want to maximize your expectations for yourself and your life?
This comes from three things:
1.) Integrity – Most important! Doing what you say you will do. Believing in it. Following through from a deeply inspired place. A lot of the time we have these great ideas and then we disrespect or sabotage ourselves and don’t follow through on the work it takes to get there. The follow through is really the key part, because that allows you reinforce the idea that you can do it and the habit or new thought sticks.
2.) Idealize – but be realistic. Idealize what your dream scenario for this situation could be. When you have the integrity part covered and you are being realistic, you can look deeply into a situation to see what’s truly possible with a sense of curiosity and wonderment. For me, an example was when I wanted to have kids. When I was pregnant, random people loved to be negative, warning me about the labour and delivery experience, that it sucked, it was uncomfortable, so painful, so so long, make sure I have drugs, etc. Immediately I reminded myself that that was their experience, it didn’t have to mean it would be mine. I chose to connect to my curiosity and daydreaming and idealizing, how could it be for me? Could I really write a different story than the one everyone was telling me? Is it possible that mine could be quick and less painful than theirs was?
3.) Implement – Integrity is whether or not you are going to do it and being real about it. Do you have the skills or could you learn them? Being idealistic by asking what could happen, and then implementing those ideas. Repeating over and over the things that are going to get you there. For me, when I was pregnant and I wanted a pain free, calm birth, I was just really open to the possibility of this. I did the work though, everyday. I did affirmations, and EFT (tapping which is Emotional Freedom Technique) where you tap on the energy meridians in your body to help you realign some thought patterns that need clearing/reframing. Implementation is repeating the work, doing it over and over to create the outcome that you desire long term.
When these three things are applied to any new situation you want to come to be, start by dreaming big and then backing it up with daily action!
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